Latest Thoughts

B'h, I just came back from my chavrusa. We're touching on elul and yomim norim. The sefarim we learned from tonight are Praying with Fire and Elul (with lightening on the cover).

One of the feelings i left with the shadow of the emotion of heart break that accompanies the guilt of a wrong doing. As in, when one realizes that one's actions were wrong, and that, therefore, one had committed an act AGAINST HaShem, there is usually a feeling of guilt that quickly follows with a heart breaking realization that something must be done to rectify the wrong deed.

This is what i felt tonight.

B"h, i was able to glimpse into yom hadin and actually prepare myself and start the teshuva process. This is what elul is all about, and i think what it's supposed to be. I wanted to convey that experience with all of you in the hopes that i can ignite the same response in you as well. I pray that we'll all be able to properly, at least to some extent, prepare ourselves for the yomei hadin that are fast approaching us, even if we don't go to slichot every morning.

I was reminded tonight that I have done wrong, and, B"H, I am not a malach. I don't know why I have gone through what i have, or why others so close and dear to me have gone through hardships as well.

I don't know why the world turns the way it does, or why our gallus seems to be standing still at the moment, ch's.

I do know that i'm a bat Yisroel and a bat melech. I need to act that way CONSTANTLY and realize that in my human actions i have not only done good.

With this reminder i hope to preform accordingly.

Good night. Kol tov. Thanks for listening.

Sarah Rut

P.S (Picture Source) http://www.oldeducator.com/reminder.gif